[ a hug was the last thing she was expecting. she has to swallow hard and close her eyes tightly to hold back a sob, and finds herself shaking once minako moves to select a weapon.

no one like that should have to be made a killer. she grits her teeth at the crowd and that's when she feels the tears start, pale green against her bright cheeks. they're the ones who deserve it the most. she could just leap into the stands and tear them all to pieces, make a feast of the blood that would paint the bleachers. she could--lose herself and become little more than the mindless monster they want her to be.

she swallows again and calls after minako faintly: ] You need to hurry. I-it could be dangerous to delay.

[ she turns to face rin, and there's a frustration in her misery. yes, death wasn't permanent. unfortunate, in kanaya's own case, and in other cases she wishes it wouldn't be so insistent with...but then at least it works for others. finn, both of them here. but there's more to this situation than that. ]

I'm not saying I deserve it for being here. I deserved to be here already. You probably don't.

[ he wraps her arms around herself and turns her eyes back to minako. ] I can't expect you to understand.

...I could have easily killed the both of you by now if I wanted.