IMAGINE HOW THE WORLD COULD BE

[bullseye]

WHO: everyone who signed up
WHERE: all over the world
WHEN: 18 June, 10 AM EST
WARNINGS: pre-emptively warning for language and violence
SUMMARY: After an attack on the Porter, Lachesis gits mad and teleports some people away
FORMAT: WORDS



Wherever they are, whatever they're doing, it all stops when the clock strikes 10:00 EST.

Suddenly, this ain't Kansas anymore.

Comments

CHINATOWN, SAN FRANCISCO

[bullseye]

[datglass]

[ The first thing Mirror Master did was stomp over to a big mirrored window pane, mildly confused but intending to pop right back to where he was. What actually happened was he walked into the window and smacked against it hard, bouncing back and landing on his ass. Which confuses and pisses him off more. ]

Awright, just what kind of mince did I step into here?

[crabulous]

Hopefully it's the meat variety of mince!

[Zoidberg is helpfully sifting through the nearest dumpster on a quest for food. Aside from being famished, he doesn't seem at all bothered by this.]

Though vegetables sound quite scrumptious as well!

[professorlionface]

[Hank was at his desk, helping with some paperwork when he was ported, so he'd found himself falling flat on his tush on arrival. He's still sitting there, trying to get his comm to work.]

It's San Francisco. But given the presence of the both of you and the fact that I haven't been in that city in months, I'm assuming we haven't been moved to a separate universe.

[datglass]

San Francisco? [ He begins to scowl, and points his Mirror gun at the window again, but all that happens is the light beam that fires out reflects back. He kicks a trash can angrily and then inspects his gun. ]

I'd offer us a lift back but it seems I cannae get into my mirrors. How'd this happen? We werenae sent here by the government, were we?

[crabulous]

Ah yes. San Francisco. The infamous City by the Bay. [Zoidberg nods knowingly.] Famous as the place where Tony Bennett misplaced his cardiac muscle, proving definitively that humans can in fact survive without such an organ.

[A pause as he tries to figure out what Mirror Master is saying. He turns to Hank, looking highly confused.]

It's the damnedest thing, but I could swear he isn't even speaking English.

[professorlionface]

[He gives Zoidberg a long look, then turns to Evan.] ...Right.

Unless they've built their own Porter, I find that unlikely, my tangerine tripmate. Communicator's not working.

[He pockets that and trades it out for his cell phone, trying his best to get a call through.]

[datglass]

What are you on about, wee man? [ Zoidberg is already making enemies. Evan crosses his arms and gestures idly with his gun-arm, deciding to write it off. ]

Something's up. [ He points his gun at a mailbox, and it does successfully turn into glass and subsequently shatter apart. ] See, it still works. Planet Earth's calling, aye, and it says something aroond here smells fishy besides our friend over there.

[ He cocks his thumb at Zoidberg. ]

They could do it, if they wanted to.

[crabulous]

[The crab creature blinks obliviously.]

Clearly we must return to the City, post haste! To the BART!

[professorlionface]

[Hank pulls his phone away, frowning. He's far too engrossed to notice Evan's little demonstration, or really anything he just said.] I swear, even in the middle of a densely populated area, I can never get adequate service!

[He finally stands, dusting himself off.]

What is the BART, exactly?

[datglass]

Did ya pay off your bill? That could be your problem.

[ Evan crossed his arms and goes stalking off a few feet, looking around. He has no idea what the BART is either. ]

Let's do something. I'm tired of this place awready.

[crabulous]

The Bay Area Rapid Transit! [He indicates toward a sign with his claw.] There's bound to be an attendant to direct us back to the City-tubes there!

[professorlionface]

I only just had the thing turned back on a week ago! The deposit I left should have me squared away!

[He follows Zoidberg's line of sight. Well, that should have been obvious, but he never really traveled by public transportation when he lived in San Francisco. He quietly blames Warren and his obscene quantities of money.]

Or at least to an airport. Getting home shouldn't be any-- [He feels around in his back pocket. Had he forgotten his wallet this morning? It's so easy to be absent-minded with such things when you live in the same building you work from.]

Oh, hell.

[datglass]

Ya got t'be swanking me. [ He just deadeyes at the both of them, but looks toward the sign. ] Well, let's make a bloody decision. I'm nae paying for plane tickets for the lot just because I'm the one with the most dosh on me.

[ ... Wait. No he doesn't. He peers into his pouches. ]

So, anyone got anything we can hock?

[crabulous]

I have nothing of value but my talent and ability to quickly make friends! Surely that will earn us safe passage back to the City! Come, friends! Let us busk!

[Zoidberg takes some initiative and scuttles over to a stranger and bursts into song!]

Once I built a tower, up to the sun,
Brick, and rivet, and lime;
Once I built a tower, now it's done.
Brother, can you spare a dime?

[The woman starts to scream!]

Merciful heavens! What's gotten into her?

[professorlionface]

[Hank lets out a cringe and hurries after Zoidberg, leading him back by the shoulder.]

Might not be the best idea! At least not outside Haight-Ashbury, where we might net some patrons.

[datglass]

[ Evan looks around lazily, settling his gaze on a restaurant, then on Zoidberg. He casually strolls over. ]

I think he's got himself the right idea. How about we go on a wee walkabout and see what kind of generous souls wander across our paths?

[ He smiles! ]

[crabulous]

What a splendid idea!

[He follows after Evan in a leisurely scuttle.]

I could provide a tasteful accompaniment to this evening's meal!

[professorlionface]

[Hank trails behind with all the confidence of a wet blanket.]

I think harassing the natives will more likely end with us in a jail cell than on our way home!

[datglass]

[ Evan turns to Beast, pointing to Zoidberg, then to the restaurant. ]

Nae if we offer them up something good for their money, aye?

[crabulous]

[Zoidberg nods excitedly, darting along beside Evan.]

Oh yes! We could offer them a perfectly performed song and dance routine. Say, fellas, do either of you know how to Madison?

[professorlionface]

[He scratches his neck uneasily.]

I don't think that's exactly the accompaniment he has in mind.

[datglass]

How much do ya weigh, Lobster man? [ Evan looked Zoidberg over slowly, thoughtfully. ] Enough to get us bus fare, isn't it?

[crabulous]

Why I never! How rude! [He looks so offended.] You can't just ask a man his weight. I'm of a delicate disposition.

[professorlionface]

[Hank rolls his eyes, the whole idea strikes him as somewhat distasteful.]

And where would you expect to get enough butter, exactly?