capeandcowllogs | [Semi Open] But as far as I can see you are still miles from me In your doorway

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[Semi Open] But as far as I can see you are still miles from me In your doorway

WHO: Bakura and anyone who would be in Hell Towers or coming to visit
WHERE: Hell Towers 10th
WHEN: All day Thursday
WARNINGS: Emo, reference to character death
SUMMARY: Bakura attempts to start dealing with the chaos that tore his world apart in his absence and come to terms with the state of his life.
FORMAT: Para to start, whatever people want after

The hardest part was the time that had passed. Passed for everyone else, but not for him. One moment, his world was fading to black, turning so so cold as his life was drained away, everything shutting down as he was pulled into the darkness once more.

And then he was in the Porter building. No soothing nothingness to cradle him, no whispering voices from times long ago, no feeling of a presence gently pushing him back, blocking his way from whatever it was waiting.

It hadn't felt real. No marks on his neck, nothing to indicate anything had happened. Only the sudden change of location. It was almost like it had been when he had worn the Ring. One moment sitting at his desk, working on his homework, the next, waking up in bed, still dressed. One moment heading back to his apartment, the next, inside the back room of the Black Crown.

One moment in his apartment, struggling to hang on to consciousness, the next, the Porter room.

It had taken him a while to even reach for the new comm, the shaking adrenaline and realization of just what had happened sending him crashing to his knees. And then the first voice to answer him, speaking words that made no sense to him.

Alastair would never...

But he had.

He didn't know what to think, what to feel, how to even respond. Something that should never have happened to him again, and yet, it had.

Don't be angry, don't be upset, he did it because you were killed, they just got in my way...

He'd stayed with Ben and Qui-Gon, not even coming up to his apartment. Not wanting to face it, not wanting to see...

He wasn't sure he even wanted to see now. The thought of the struggle that he had lost... what would it even look like? Trowa said he had prepared it, would it all be as if nothing had happened?

Was Alastair even back from the hospital...?

He stood outside the doorway, still in his indecision. The door was only inches away, but it may have been a mile.

He didn't know what to do. He couldn't hide away form it forever, he knew that at least. But nothing else was clear.

Not even who he could trust.

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Kiryu had been hanging out in the Mancave, taking out some pent up aggression on a fighting game and giving Alastair some space. He wasn't sure why, but he'd been feeling like snapping at Alastair since the man had woken up, especially when he brought up Bakura or the weekend or his new powers. Kiryu had nothing but fond feelings for that power, and Alastair seemed to have anything but, and Kiryu was just so relieved that he was alone that he didn't want to push Alastair away.

And there were just the feelings he'd had over the last week otherwise. Rage over Bakura's death, frustration that they couldn't find who was responsible, anger at himself for failing not one but both of his brothers, vague irritation that his anguish over Alastair was all in vain anyway...Every moment of annoyance he'd felt over the last few days were just hitting him now and, while he could supress it around Alastair, it was even more frustrating to do that.

But he couldn't just go out and do something about it; he had to, wanted to, stay close to Alastair and their apartment in case Bakura came home. Speaking of...

He paused the game and went to check whether Bakura had come back yet again...and blinked a little when he saw that yes he was. It took another moment before he could say anything.

"...Bakura...?"

The teen turned, lips curving in a small, unsure smile. "Kiryu-kun..."

He looked almost like he was on the verge of tears again, but these were mostly relieved.

Kiryu smiled a little, glad that it seemed Bakura wasn't mad at him right now, and quickly crossed the hall to envelop Bakura in a tight hug. he could be angry later; Bakura wasn't dead and he'd come home.

Bakura startled the barest moment before clinging to his brother, tears escaping as he buried his face in Kiryu's shoulder.

That just made him hug Bakura even tighter and start running his fingers over Bakura's back. After dying three times, he could definitely understand where this was coming from. Even if part of him was a little exasperated with it.

Slowly, the tension melted from Bakura's shoulders and he half slumped against his brother, giving a small sniffle. "Sorry..." he half whispered. He'd been crying so much since... it made him feel like he was being an annoying wimp, but he couldn't help it.

"Don't worry about it," Kiryu muttered, still rubbing his back. "That's what brothers are for, right?"

Bakura fell silent a long moment, starting to get freshly upset despite the comfort being given. "Kiryu-kun... About Oniichan... I don't know what to do," he near whispered in a small, miserable voice.

Kiryu sighed and rested his chin on Bakura's head. He figured Bakura was going to bring this up sometime, but it would have been nice if he'd waited until everyone was less upset.

"Why do you have to do anything?" he said after a moment. "No one got hurt in the end."

If he waited that long, no one would get to be less upset because he'd be avoiding Alastair the entire time.

"But.. but he..." Bakura's voice choked a little. "Shuichi-kun.. and Bruno...! When he said he..."

He was still no good at forming the right words. But at least he wasn't getting angry this time. It was an improvement.

"He didn't hurt them. And they're back now." Kiryu paused to take a deep breath and get rid of the irritation in his voice. Bakura hadn't been there or in his nightmare months ago, so he didn't understand how great this power really was. Most of the time.

"With Bruno...he was just trying to protect me...the others were just in the wrong place at the wrong time."

"But..." The protest was tired and miserable, his shoulders slumping. He didn't want to have to explain why he was so upset. He didn't want to have to think about the Ring's voice or what had happened.

But he couldn't just ignore it...

Kiryu let go and took a step back, crossing his arms. He wasn't sure what else to say. He didn't know why Bakura had such a problem with that power, other than just by being Bakura, he had a problem with hurting people. But it hadn't hurt anyone. Maybe if Alastair hadn't come back...

"Why do you have such a problem with it?" he asked finally, sounding a little harsher than he really wanted. he didn't think Bakura would really appreciate what they'd done this weekend, but this wasn't just not appreciating it.

Bakura flinched slightly, looking down and to the side.

That was right... Kiryu didn't know about...

"Because that's what the Ring's voice did..." he said in a very soft voice.

That didn't help much. He knew Bakura and the other Bakura didn't and probably never would get along, and that was because of stuff that had happened back home. And Bakura had made it clear his lookalike was a bad person.

But he'd also tried to help Alastair with no reason to. And he hadn't been completely unpleasant to talk to.

"They're not the same," he said after a long moment.

"I know..." Bakura's voice was a near whisper.

That was why it hurt more. Because Alastair was better than that.

"Then..." Kiryu let out his breath in a small hiss. "He didn't hurt anyone! Everyone's back where they belong. Alastair's back. I would've gotten hurt if he didn't have that power!"

He wasn't sure why he was so frustrated all of a sudden, especially when he'd been doing so well holding back. But he definitely hadn't thought Bakura would be so upset with them. He just wanted everything to go back to how it was.

Bakura flinched again, curling in on himself a bit more. "And if Kaiba-kun hadn't beaten him...?" he asked in a tiny voice. "Would everyone still be in comas, there but not there, until I had to run away again? I don't want to hear that jerk say that Oniichan is the same as he is!"

"He was going to let them go. He didn't need them anymore." Which he wasn't actually sure about, but he was going to believe that, because Alastair was a good person. "They might have gone back on their own, anyway," he added, remembering how Alastair had woken up on his own.

"Truly...?"

Souls returning on their own... had that ever happened? The Ring had to be defeated by Yuugi before any of his friends had been released. And he had been too afraid that his other friends hadn't been restored, or worse, and died before they could have been to check.

But nothing was right in this place. After all, his own soul...

He tensed a little, breath catching. Don't think about it, don't think about it, don't--

Kiryu was quiet for a long moment before finally answering. "Alastair's did. Even though..."

Actually, maybe he shouldn't mention who had answered his called for help. It probably wouldn't result in good things. Especially considering he hadn't actually helped.

"Thank goodness..." Bakura near whispered, rubbing under one eye. "When... when the Ring used to... it wasn't until Yuugi-kun defeated him that anybody... I don't know if some of them even..."

He rubbed his eyes again. Not going to cry, not going to cry, goddamnit, Bakura Ryou, you're 19 years old, almost an adult, be an adult about these things and stop crying!

He took a shuddering deep breath, trying to cut off the memories and get himself back under control.

"Tch, I never said they'd definitely go back," Kiryu muttered, suddenly irrationally annoyed with the crying. "He's never had this power before; it might've been a fluke."

There was a long pause as realization slowly dawned on him. "When he vanished.... The Porter did this, didn't it?"

It only made sense. His magic had changed when he had lost that weekend. When Alastair had been taken...

And the Porter did enjoy making people hurt.

Oh. He hadn't even thought of that, but it did make sense. People were usually different in some way after getting Ported out and back in.

"That was right after the nightmares too, wasn't it? Maybe...that was why..."

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i got this notif! :O

\o/ They seem to be mostly fixed!

hopefully! \o/

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