crazed and calm with a sinners psalm

[goryteller]

WHO: Katurian and Ruka / Katurian and Cassie
WHERE: Ruka's place / Cassie's place
WHEN: Late at night, March 15th for Ruka. March 16th for Cassie.
WARNINGS: Discussion of murder, possible threats.
SUMMARY: There are two children that have the potential to ruin Katurian's life.
FORMAT: Quicklog.

[For Ruka, Katurian's visit is heralded by a small, plush lion dropping smoothly, soundlessly on the ground in front of her. The toy is clean. Unsullied.

For Cassie, Katurian appears in front of her bed late, late, late at night with bloodshot eyes and a twitch to his fingers. He doesn't wear his costume, but his body doesn't make any sound in the air, either, as though he is merely a piece of empty space, as though he doesn't belong.

He is Traveling today.]

Comments

[dragony]

[She hesitates for only a moment before getting up, looping around the table full of scattered papers and improbable futures before scooping up the lion onto one arm. Its legs dangle.

There's no sound in the house, but she recognizes the lion and knows what it means. No fear trembles in her footsteps, her soft weight hidden between socks and carpet.]

[goryteller]

Good evening, Ruka.

[He whispers. Hushed.]

[dragony]

Evening. [Her return greeting is quiet as well, the slightest of bows at her neck. The lion remains secure in her arms, simultaneous anchor and life preserver of soft fur.]

It's been a while, hasn't it?

[goryteller]

[He wavers in the doorway, his limbs unsteady, and takes hold of the wall for support. Then he steps forward.]

I've lied to you.

[dragony]

[She stands her ground, unflinching. Not even her grip on the lion tightens for threat.]

How do you mean?

[goryteller]

I'm an import. I'm not dead.

[The words come out quickly, like ripping off a bandage. He still whispers.]

I'm sorry.

[dragony]

[She turns her head a little, good eye to the fore. The ground wavers beneath her, but it does not shatter. She holds a little tighter to the lion.]

I never thought you were dead.

[Oh, semantics.]

[goryteller]

I'm no spirit. I'm a human, and I'm trying to help the people in this place.

[He softens his voice. It wavers.]

I'm trying to help you.

[dragony]

[Cautiously now, Ruka is the one to take the step forward, watching his mask as though its expression could change. The reveal of the lie hurts -- he's a friend she's known the longest of anyone, anyone in the City -- but she's not so petty as to end everything for that, is she?]

I know. All these years, you've always tried to help me.

[goryteller]

A day away from now, other people are going to know who I am. They're going to see me.

[dragony]

That's... [Somehow, she feels he's not the same as when he visited her that day. When he gave her that list, and told her what he was doing in this time. Her lower lip hides for a moment behind her teeth.] ... That's not a good thing, is it?

[goryteller]

People are going to look for me. I'll be in considerable danger.

[He extends his not-quite transparent hand, his gloved palm upright.]

I can still die, and I can still end up captured. Whatever happens, I want you to know that I'm on your side.

[dragony]

[The lion remains steady on her one arm, and with the other Ruka reaches over that short distance. She places her much smaller hand in his, glove against glove. A dark bloody red resting on cotton white. She tries to hold his hand, as if that could offer some comfort.

Like he's done for her, all these years.]

Is there anything I can do? To help? I don't want anything to happen to you.

[goryteller]

[That moment of comfort is almost too much. He doesn't know why it hits him so hard, but suddenly he's ducking his head, fighting the breath in his throat. Fighting tears.

Isn't this good? Isn't this how his life is supposed to be?]

No. [His voice is collected enough. Still a whisper.] Don't put yourself in danger. Stay careful. Just stay careful.

[dragony]

[Part of her flinches at that. He told her who was dangerous. He warned her, warned her right before that time, and had she listened? Look at her now, disfigured and alone, look at the people she still surrounds herself with. Would she listen now?

Her head bowed.]

There's some dangers I can't avoid. [She is who she is.] But I'll try.

[goryteller]

I know.

[He nods his head, his face bowed as well, his eyes focused on the smooth white fabric of his pants. No stains. No blood. The shoes he wears today have no smiling faces on their treads.]

There are some dangers none of us can avoid. But I ask you, please, I ask you not to-- not to do anything for my sake.

[dragony]

... Alright.

[Her fingers twitch and tremble, though the rest of her remains steady. The words feel heavy in her mouth, and she doesn't look up. Not yet.]

I suppose... I should know who you are, shouldn't I? Your human face.

[goryteller]

[The words catch him off the guard. His hand tenses in her's.]

Now isn't the time. Ruka.

[dragony]

[She looks up, staring steadily towards his pillow face, where she assumes his eyes would be hidden.]

You can't expect me to keep a promise like that, if I don't know who it is I'm not supposed to help.

[goryteller]

Isn't it enough to know that I'm doing the right thing? That I'm helping people?

[dragony]

... What are you frightened of?

[goryteller]

[He swallows hard.]

I could be killed. If my identity is revealed. I could be killed or locked up for a very long time.

[dragony]

[She squeezes his hand. She's being the steady one here.]

And you think someone would... think I would know? You know I wouldn't tell anyone. You're my friend.