I could see it was a rough cut Tuesday

[shotup]

WHO: Roy, Troy, and Abed aka the Three Amigos!
WHERE: Laura's Dojo
WHEN: Right now!
WARNINGS: N/A
SUMMARY: Roy shows his new buddies how to be actual real super heroes by teaching them some rad fighting moves.
FORMAT: Quick!

[Today's adventure combines two things Roy enjoys: fighting and friendship! Finding someone he can spar with has been a bit of a challenge, but once this idea to teach Troy and Abed how to fight came to mind, he ran with it. What could possibly be more amazing than male bonding and fist fights?! Nothing!

Plus, there was the added bonus that sparring meant Roy wouldn't have to think about the mess in his head, or that weirdo Green Arrow guy that seems to think they're somehow related. What's up with that? Pfft.

Anyways, Roy has arranged for some private time in the School of Thunder Dojo for the boys to hang out and engage in fisticuffs. And while he's resolved to go easy on these beginners, he's quite an intimidating sight, all tall and full of muscles. But don't mind him, gang! He's only dangerous when you piss him off!]

Comments

[coolcubed]

We can google it. [ It's almost as exciting as learning to fight like superheroes. Googling is pretty much the precursor to many a fun-filled afternoon. He bets they can set up a movie where Chuck Norris's heart eats itself. Definitely saving that one for later.

Which is to say that the hint to focus flutters right over his head, and then Abed just kind of stares at Roy with his eyebrows furrowed while he's making adjustments. Physical contact: not usually his schtick. But he sort of knew to expect it in this scenario. He contemplates the air-punching, too, and opts to seek clarification. ]

Can we pretend we're punching a concept or property, and are we allowed to pretend to be somebody else?

[kegflipped]

[ Troy does fine with the adjusting segment, and follows through on the punches easily enough. He's doesn't have the force or speed of Roy, but maybe that just takes practice. He tries again.

He doesn't have a lot to offer in the way of answers to Abed's questions. Troy's just punching air. He doesn't know a lot of obnoxious dicks that he actually wants to punch. There's super villains, he guesses, but he hasn't met most of them in person. ]

But you gotta learn to fight as yourself, don't you? Be your own thing?

[shotup]

That's right, Troy. Pretending you're Bruce Lee is all well and good, but you're not Bruce Lee. You're you. You gotta stay in your right head space when you're fighting, otherwise you could get confused.

[He demonstrates a few more punches, then walks around to watch his pupil's and their techniques.]

Good, Abed. But I gotta know, who're you pretending to punch?

[coolcubed]

[ Noted, then. Clarification, as they say, is key. His mouth pulls a bit to one side for hearing it, but he asked for a reason. He has a better picture of the boundaries this way, he guesses. ]

It's an amalgamation. A Frankenstein's monster of irks and undesirables based around my own personal preferences and distastes, that me being myself might believably be able to pretend to punch. [ Because these are always things to take into account. ] Ten percent Firefly's cancellation, fifteen percent Cougar Town's move to mid-season, twenty percent M. Night Shyamalan's 'The Last Airbender,' ten percent AC repair annex before Troy became their messiah, five percent analog clocks, five percent Evil Abed, five percent Professor Duncan as an evil claymation Christmas warlock, five percent the manager at Señor Kevin's who said Die Hard was bad, and... twenty-five percent left over for bad prequels and-or sequels. [ Perfect in a pinch. He dislikes all of those things. He'd believe in his ability to fake punch them. ]

I'll fine-tune it more when I have more time.

[kegflipped]

[ As somebody who gets all of the references, Troy nods. He's gotta hand it to Abed, that's a pretty mean amalgawhatever of things, even given the fact that clocks don't trip him up and the Señor Kevin's manager is ignorable, and... He's still not totally sure what an Evil Abed is. Abed isn't evil. ]

Sounds punchable.

[shotup]

[Well okay then.]

Sounds like you've got the right idea there, buddy,

[There's a friendly slap on Abed's back as Roy turns to Troy.]

How about you, man? What's getting you in the zone?

[coolcubed]

[ Wait, whoa, hey- oh. A back-slapper. He's filing Roy away as an Affectionate Physical Contact guy until further notice.

Possibly a "thought you were choking" guy, but his sources are usually reliable in these diagnostic processes.

And yes, do go on, Troy. Abed has air to focus on. Which is to say he's mostly leaning over to catch that answer, too. ]

[kegflipped]

I didn't put that much thought into it.

[ Welcome to the World of Troy Barnes. ]

Guess I'm trying to figure how hard I'd have to hit if I got into a fight with an actual super-villain or something. Or Chang as a super-villain. Or a dinosaur. Maybe like a really smart raptor.

[shotup]

Smart raptors. Yeah. Imagine if it somehow evolved a brain big enough to do complex calculations so it could invent weapons or something. That'd suck.

[Roy's not really thinking about it. He's already on to something else.]

You're punching looks pretty good. But you won't always be on the attack. So we've got to work on your defense.

[coolcubed]

They opened doors and set traps in Jurassic Park. Most raptors are smart. At least they probably wouldn't let Chang ride them. [ Chang riding a super smart raptor is the last thing any universe needs. ] And Roy's right. Defense is an integral part of the superhero system.

[kegflipped]

Right. How not to get punched. Might be good to know.

[ Take it away, Roy. ]

[shotup]

The most important thing is to keep your balance. [He takes a good stance, arms up.] You're going to work on blocking, slipping, bobbing and weaving, and we're gonna learn how to parry.

First, let's do some blocking. Punch me, Abed. Come at me with your best shot.

[coolcubed]

[ Man. It's always such a pleasant surprise to come by a competent teacher anymore. This guy actually has a plan in mind and knows what he's doing. ]

Okay. [ Cue Abed immediately stepping forward as prompted and doing his best to comply, free of attitude change. He goes for more of a jab than a shoulder back, wide-swinging kind of punch.

Not the most climactic way to go about it, but he doesn't think this is a particularly climactic moment. Nobody is in old-timey high-waisted shorts, America's pride in the face of the Soviet threat isn't at stake, and he and Roy don't have an established rivalry creating a tense chemistry. Besides, it's safe to assume Roy will be blocking it if the plan is to do some blocking. Why waste a dramatic punch on demonstration when you're not being someone else and nobody's got a camera? ]