capeandcowllogs | (no subject)

Entry tags:

(no subject)

WHO: Look at the tags
WHERE: Starting at ~~his~~ ~~her~~ ~~their place~~ the MAC, around town, out of town, the surface of the sun
WHEN: Sometime after this but before this
WARNINGS: no
WHAT: Zelgadis takes some advice.
WORDS: yes

It was afternoon; shining was the sun, cold was the air, and doing nothing in particular was Terra, sitting by a closed window. Her expression and mood were not easy to read, especially turned toward the glass as she was, which at the very least meant she was neither bubbling over with joy nor bawling her eyes out for sorrow. Presently, she felt--well, if you asked her, Terra wouldn't be able to answer, either. Emotions were a complicated subject.

So for now, she was focused halfway between herself and the mundane action of a couple laughing teenagers pretending to be giant robots and chasing pigeons.

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Even if, by some miracle, someone were to sit down and explain just how utterly normal this situation was, Terra wouldn't be inclined to believe it. She didn't understand most of her emotions to begin with, and the rest were ones she was so utterly bad at identifying, she had convinced herself that she wasn't physically capable of experiencing them.

Denial: one large root to their mutual forest of awkward interactions.

"Uhm..." was a struggle to get out, fingernails scratching at spots of dirt on her palms for something to do. Are you going to spit it out or not? Terra opened her mouth again, glancing his way—but once again balked.

Why was this suddenly so difficult? It wasn't like she wanted to talk about how she died, or Illidan, or how Zelgadis had found her after setting a tornado loose in her apartment, all topics that deserved anxiety. It had every right to be a simple conversation, so why wasn't it?

Maybe it'd be better to ask later? If she needed to ask at all. The answer might present itself without her needing to throw out her questions, and it wasn't like they wouldn't see each other for a long time once they went back. He was still letting her stay with him, after all. That, at least, made some sense in her mind, but this...

Her teeth made a quiet click for closing.

"Huh?"

Zelgadis practically spoke over her, fast as his reaction was. He gaped, blinked, then let himself sit a little less stiffly, exhaling when she shut her mouth. Back to the ground, ears and face burning. Wow. He was an idiot.

Her shoulders tensed and, were her nails sharper, she might have cut her palm open for how hard she scratched at the sound of his voice. Sheesh, she didn't even have to say anything for things to get weird. This wasn't the sort of atmosphere she wanted, either; she had to say something.

"I just..." she started, keeping her face turned toward her hands—away from Zelgadis.

Again, Zelgadis' head whipped over at the sound of her voice, holding his breath. He realized what he was doing rather quickly that time around, exhaling and de-perfect-posturizing again. No wonder she kept biting her tongue; he looked ready to spontaneously combust each time she said something.

He tilted his head away and down just enough to still be able to see with both eyes, mouth tugging half a frown.

"Just?"

Would it be better to drop the subject or just spit it out? Terra continued to waver over her response, but finally released a nearly inaudible sigh, resolute.

Even if she wasn't looking in his direction, Terra had to fight an urge to hide her face in her hands when she spoke. "... wanted to say thanks." At that, she really wanted to hit herself in the face - it wasn't what she'd been trying to say at all, but she couldn't backtrack on it and go where she'd been aiming. Not that she'd want to take it back, since it was true, but not where she'd been intending to go. Maybe she just needed to stop over-thinking it.

Oh.

He'd definitely expected worse. Zelgadis blinked, then blinked again, staring at her blankly. His brain kicked in after a moment, shoving aside attempts to nitpick such a simple statement.

"It's alright," he said, exhaling shakily.

"I mean it," she shot back, a heavy emphasis to her tone. "I mean... nobody does this sort of thing for me... without some bigger motive." After all, the main reason she'd been protected and taken to the Returners in her own world was for her power, and what it would mean for the war effort. They hadn't wanted to force her, but their reasons had certainly been transparent. "I'm not sure why you bother, for someone like me, but... it means a lot to me. So... thank you."

Zelgadis winced a little at the explanation. Was that what she was mulling over? Sure, that kind of thing was expected from Lina, but he wasn't...Was he?

No. Definitely not. Not even if--

"W-we're friends," he said. "So that's...really all..." Really?

The "yeah," was said with a nod, more from acknowledging what he was saying than agreeing flat-out. "But it still does. I haven't had many."

For the heavy subject, Terra's tone was unexpectedly light; it was somehow a little easier for her to speak now, and when she turned to face Zelgadis, she was smiling. Whether she was trying to ease the weight from him or from her own shoulders was difficult to tell.

"We've been friends for longer than I knew anyone in my home world," she explained, fingers trailing through her bangs for something to do. "So things like this... it's ordinary for you, but it's... something else for me. Even I'm not sure—"

Terra cut herself off with a strangled laugh, face heating red before she turned back to look off to the woods. It was impossible for her to let anything just be what it was, wasn't it? Every time she opened her mouth, she made things awkward and weird.

He couldn't have flushed more than he already had earlier, but if he could, the smile would've set it off. It had a slight, dizzying effect that wasn't altogether terrible - just terrifying in a way. Not dark lord descending from another dimension terrifying, either. Doing something right for a change terrifying. Maybe that wasn't even the right word for it.

Well, whatever the word, he was more secure that he wasn't outright repulsive or weird for the time being. That, and the fact he liked her a whole lot more when she was smiling. She was being damn adorable, flustered like that; the edge of his mouth tugged up a little.

"It can be ordinary for you," he said, leaning back against the tree again, looking forward. "If that's what you want."

If the blushing were something Terra noticed on Zelgadis, she didn't acknowledge it; blue-faced and plum made it harder to notice than pale-faced and tomato, like she was, but being unable to pin down why she was turning red made it near impossible to find motive for him.

Thoughts about that went flying off like a bird when he spoke up. Terra turned her head a little his way, cheeks still red. "Huh?"

"D-doing things, and..." Zelgadis' hand gestured vaguely for lack of words, retreating and scratching impulsively at his cheek. "Friend stuff you said you don't normally do. I mean. I don't know."

Something felt as though it were bubbling in her chest, though Terra had no idea what, or why; her fingers twitched as if to grasp it, hesitant and excited both.

"Really?"

He shrugged quickly. "Nobody's really going to stop you."

Once more she ducked her head, fingers still distractedly combing and brushing through her hair for nerves. It took several long seconds of silence before she could spit out "... I'd like that."

Moments like that never really ever bore much fruit before. Moments like that usually involved Lina barreling in for heaven-knows-what, snapping everyone back to reality and dragging out a situation with more trouble than anyone ought to have to deal with.

So it was weird. Weird...but not terrible.

"Okay."

Moments like this were a brand new territory for her — so new, Terra wasn't capable of realizing this was a certain, specific kind of moment. It might have made things easier to bear later on if she had, but it was not to be.

She instead lapsed back into contemplative silence, a little more confident now than she'd felt before.

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