open log!

[crab]

WHO: karkat and you.
WHERE: UH WOW I'M BAD AT NEW YORK'S GEOGRAPHY SO ANYWHERE REALLY HELP ME OUT but around/not too far from 86th and 3rd i guess.
WHEN: 22nd april.
WARNINGS: karkat's pottymouth.
SUMMARY: karkat's curiosity has gotten the better of him and he is exploring the city. and he has managed to get himself lost OOPS.
FORMAT: quicklog.

[ not only is it daylight, which is extraordinarily unsettling for someone who has grown up in a society that associated daylight with being scorched and blinded, but earth cities are a lot more noisy and crowded than on alternia oh my god. EVERYTHING IS SO BRIGHT AND LOUD AND THERE ARE SO MANY ADULTS???? HE HAS NEARLY BEEN HIT BY A CAR TWICE. HELP. someone assist the thirteen year old alien wandering about looking anxious and bewildered. occasionally spitting out a few verses of profanity. ]

Comments

afternoon @ papaya king

[culver]

[Nill has her hands folded behind her back as she stands outside of Papaya King, rocking on her heels, wings flitting a bit. She was deciding whether or not she wanted a hot dog. The automatic answer was yes, but she still deigned to wait outside and make a decision.]

[crab]

[ while nill considers the conundrum of hot dogs, karkat considers the conundrum of where in asscrack avenue he is. he walks by her to begin with, but-

weren't those wings... he knows someone with wings...

he is whirling around and marching back the way he came. YES. SOMEONE HE RECOGNIZES. ALSO SOMEONE WHO ISN'T OBNOXIOUS. ]

Nill!

[culver]

[Hearing her name, she blinks in confusion and then turns... seeing a person who is obviously a troll. She recognizes the grey skin and horns, at least. And his voice is familiar--this is Karkat! She hasn't actually met him, but it's nice to finally get the chance to. She just wonders if he'll be as wordy in-person as he is over the comms. Not that she'd mind--it was kind of cute.

Lifting a hand,the blonde waves with a smile, turning away from the restaurant to greet him.]

[crab]

[ he approaches her and the restaurant. he looks a strange combination of awkward and irate with a tinge of relief. ]

You would not- I cannot- believe the almighty flood of runny shit I've been put through today. It is like today has been one humongous mechanical clothes cleansing device filled with excrement and I have been the unfortunate, lone sock left on spin cycle. Where are we. Besides hell.

[culver]

[Wow that is one combination of emotions that she has actually seen quite often on Heine! So she is going to do her best to. Not make it worse. As he speaks, her brow furrows and her expression becomes more and more sympathetic. Poor Karkat. She reaches out to gently pat his shoulder.]

[crab]

[ he reflexively tenses a little when she touches him, but besides that, he doesn't shrug her hand off.

he also doesn't. actually know she can't talk so he's going to repeat his question. ]

Where are we?

[culver]

[Oh whoops. Well, she gestures to the big sign that says "Papaya King," hoping that will be a good enough answer for him! Because to be hones, she is not really sure what else to say. Well, gesture at.]

[crab]

[ uh. he looks up at the sign, then back down at her. ]

Who the fuck is a Papaya King and why does he reign over tropical fruits.

[culver]

[Oh, honey. She can't help but silently laugh. But she reaches for his hand, intending to lead him to the counter so she can order a hotdog for both of them.]

[crab]

[ he... follows...

confused. ]

What's the matter, do you have a frond nub jammed down your chute or something?

[culver]

[She doesn't know what he means... but she gets the gist of it and uses her thought-speak power to answer, without thinking. In his head, he'll hear Nill's voice in whatever way he might imagine it.]

I cannot talk.

[crab]

[ he jumps because wow he was not expecting that, and claps both hands over his ears. ]

Holy shit!

[culver]

[Nill hops back as well, wings folded close to her back, looking upset with herself. She hadn't meant to scare him; but she forgot that she could do that, really.]

[crab]

[ he probably wouldn't have jumped as violently otherwise, but the sensory overload the city has given him has set him pretty damn on edge. ]

Well. Fuck. So, what, you're mute? You really do have a figurative frond nub down your chute, then?

[culver]

[Her cheeks redden. She nods, wings stretching out and fluttering a bit. She had pulled them against her back so quickly that they had cramped a bit.]

[crab]

[ karkat unfortunately doesn't have a record of being sensitive about other people's physical handicaps. ]

Well you get a one way ticket to being markedly less obnoxious than half the population in one fell swoop. I'm guessing the telepathy bullshit is your power?

[culver]

[It's actually kind of nice to not immediately be pitied. Nill has never really felt handicapped because of her muteness. She nods at the question, a smile making its way back to her face.]

[crab]

Could you warn someone before you go around projecting your thoughts into their brains? And don't go through mine. That's private.

[culver]

[She nods, but holds up her hands and shakes her head when he tells her to "not go through his." She couldn't actually do that; she could only talk.]

[crab]

Is that a no, I'm going to go through your thoughts anyway because fuck you Karkat, or no I'm not going to do that because I'm making it my goal in life to not be a hefty butt chomping douchesack?

[culver]

[After deciphering his speech, she holds up two fingers to indicate the second option.]

sometime during the day... on insert street here

[answerthequestion]

[Helping a bewildered alien isn't exactly on the to-do list Renee has stuffed in her back pocket as she runs errands, but you can never take the cop out of the person even if you take the badge away et cetera et cetera. When she spots Karkat (and hears a particularly creative string of cussing), she heads over to him.]

Hey, kid, you lost or something?

we're good at locations

[crab]

[ he totally doesn't jump when she approaches him. definitely didn't jump. ]

No, I know precisely where I am. I'm about halfway up Bumfuck Nowhere Boulevard, not too far from Slimegulch Junction, which is next to Cankerthrob Crossing.

the very best B|

[answerthequestion]

[Renee raises an eyebrow. Somebody is a little crabby. Yeaaahhhhh.]

Lost then. You a new arrival to the City?

[crab]

Yeah, fine. You could say that. [ he's been here nearly two months but only about two hours of that was spent in the actual city.

there is also the fact that this is an adult and before being imported to the city he hadn't met a single adult face to face, let alone come into contact with a whole city absolutely teeming with them. forgive him if he ... edges away a little. also forgive the mistrustful stare. ]

[answerthequestion]

[The edging away only makes Renee more confused. She's used to it from kids, but that was when she was in uniform or had her badge around her neck. Maybe she still has that air of authority. She rubs her chin.

It doesn't even occur to her that Karkat might be an alien from a planet where adults are never around.]

I'm not going to hurt you or anything, you just look like you need some help.

[crab]

[ usually on alternia if you came into contact with an adult before you'd come of age yourself it meant you were pretty much dead. he's aware that it is very different with humans, but visceral response doesn't respond to rationality all that well. ]

I'm fine. I have everything completely under control. I love having no barfthrobbing clue where I am and nearly getting run down by pustulebulged shit heads in scuttle buggies. I thrive on it.

[answerthequestion]

Be my guest to continue to run into traffic.

[What is dealing with teenagers, we just don't know.]

Or I could save us both the grief of having to deal with an accident report. [Then comes an explanation on how to read the traffic lights and cross the street without dying.]

[crab]

Shut up. How would you even do that.

[ polite. ]

[soulbondee]

[ it has been one hell of a weekend for Yuma, attempted murder aside, and really he was just making a quick run to the store to pick up some cat food for Bombalurina and Skimbleshanks -- or Bomb and Shanks, as they were quickly being nicknamed.

and by cat food, he really meant regular groceries, because Yuma knows nothing about animal care and obviously cats like cheeseburgers just as much as people do, right?

in any case, it was him and Tora sleeping in the hood of his jacket making the grocery run, minding their own running-and-flying business when the screeching of car horns makes Yuma flinch and his attention turn to the road--

oh hey
there's some kid caught in traffic.

Yuma jogs in place for a moment, really really tempted to keep going, but...

man he will feel so guilty if he doesn't do something. thus, with an air of exasperation, Yuma just

you know

runs out into traffic too
reaching to grab that guy by the arm. ]

Y'know they're not gonna slow down at all, right?! Come on!!

[ KARKAT LET THE MYSTERIOUS BOY WITH STUPID HAIR SAVE YOU FROM SPEEDING TRAFFIC. ]

[crab]

[ KARKAT IS HONESTLY WILLING TO LET ANYONE SAVE HIM FROM THIS NIGHTMARE. he was just trying to cross the road and then suddenly cars everywhere???? HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO, HE IS CONVINCED HE IS GOING TO DIE. there are four wheeled motorized transportation vessels zooming past him on either side and they all make the same horrifying beeping noises at him as they go past. he is torn between terror and screaming his outrage at the drivers.

and then there's

a hand

on his arm

WHERE ARE WE GOING OH MY GOD YOU'RE GOING TO KILL US BOTH STRANGE HUMAN BOY WITH RIDICULOUS HAIR??? ]

WHAT ARE YOU DOING OH MY GOD WE'RE BOTH GOING TO DIE YOU NUBSUCKING MORON-- WATCH OUT IT'S GOING TO HIT US --HOLY SHIT ARE YOU INSANE WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU-- OH GOD OH MAN OH GOD--?!

[soulbondee]

[ It's almost like a fucking ballet out here, trying to get across even a single lane of traffic while spinning out of the way of a too-far-extended mirror or collegiate assholes making threatening swerves; one last asshole not checking before making a right-hand turn has Yuma panicking a little, tugging harder on Karkat's arm. ]

Jump!

[ because he is on his way to airborne and KARKAT IT WILL BE SO MUCH EASIER TO THROW YOU TO SAFETY IF YOU OBLIGE. ]

[crab]

[ karkat has been panicking this whole time and while he does oblige when told to jump- it's not like he has any other options- he also decides now is prime time to give vocalization to his very deep and profound thoughts at this moment- ]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHGGGHHFUCK!

[soulbondee]

[ and CONGRATULATIONS, sidewalk has been reached! there's a bit of stumbling away from the road, but between honking cars and stupid teenage boys leaping out of traffic, any nearby pedestrians have long since cleared away and are at least leaving this segment of sidewalk nearly deserted.

of course, cars continue honking at them for that whole round of stupidity, but whatever!! Yuma retains his hold on Karkat's arm, at least until it looks like he's not going to fall over from fright. ]

Jeez, you almost got hit!

[crab]

[ SIDEWALK HE COULD KISS YOU but he won't because that's gross. instead he's going to get angry at the guy who just saved his life to hopefully cover up just how panicked he was a second ago (and still kind of is). ]

Wow, I honestly never noticed, thank you for telling me, human stranger. I would have had a hard time realizing that I was just subject to a near death experience without you here to inform me.

[soulbondee]

Sheesh... [ taking him completely seriously; this will go so well. ] So you're totally clueless?

[crab]

[ augh he hates it when people don't understand he's being scathing!! ]

No you idiot, is the weight of that hairstyle bearing down on your pan causing it to short out under the pressure? I was being sarcastic for the sake of being disparaging.

[soulbondee]

Shut up! There's nothing wrong with my hair! [ he crosses his arms over his chest, looking huffy--sensitive subject?--and when he continues speaking, he's not looking at Karkat at all. ]

So what happened, light change on you?

[crab]

Your hair is a heinous crime against filamentous biomaterial.

[caprihorn]

[S'up this is a grumpy looking clown looking at his bro like he's afraid that his moirail might disappear at any second.

He may also have a tiny dent in his robotic arm from where he punched a vy fast moving vehicle.]

_{I'm not letting you get on being up at in a street again, bro.} And I'm not motherfuckin' letting you in a street again. _{You ain't a good brother to have around cars.}

[crab]

[ this is a horrified looking crab child that is looking at gamzee like he's... well, like he's gamzee. ]

Gamzee I wasn't even in danger that time you over reactive idiot, that's a fucking crosswalk and I was crossing it, I did not need you to butt your club fondling ass in to engage in a brawl with a car and nearly turn us both into festering roadkill.

[caprihorn]

That motherfucker wasn't getting to stopping. _{I ain't seen the shit here go that fast and stop before they make a brother as close to the road} as I made brothers and sisters close to their lost friends.

_{Don't do that again.}

[He's just going to reach for him like and try to kind of pull him under one of his arms and keep a grip on him. Karkat shouldn't wander, obviously being in the scary clown boy's arms is safer.]

[crab]

[ karkat is not having this! he is going to struggle and squirm and attempt to yank himself out of gamzee's grip. ]

Gamzee you are not my lusus.

[caprihorn]

[Nope, he's trying to hold on because Gamzee is still not good with realizing that sometimes people need fucking space.]

Yeah, just your moirail bro.

[crab]

That doesn't give you licence to make an unmitigated ass out of yourself because you've got some crazy protection complex. Let go, crustnugget, you're choking me.

[caprihorn]

[He'll loosen the death grip a little bit, but nothing much else is happening beyond that except for one little sound coming out in an attempt to calm along with one attempted gentle pat on Karkat's shoulder.]

_Honk.

[crab]

Fuck you. [ grumble grumble grumble. he's still squirming and trying to get away, but not quite as much as before. ]

[caprihorn]

[Yeah, like Gamzee's noticing it as well as someone else would. He's going to keep holding and guess what?]

Honk.