well jesus christ i'm alone again

[crab]

WHO: karkat vantas, gamzee makara.
WHERE: gamzee's house.
WHEN: evening of 2nd of may.
WARNINGS: gamzee being gamzee???
SUMMARY: karkat revives and becomes worried about a murderous clown running around unchecked.
FORMAT: quick.

[ it took him some time to get back to gamzee's home. after being ported back into the city he'd spent a full twenty minutes on a bench in the street just breathing, gasping, wheezing, near hyperventilating until he'd adequately reassured himself that he wouldn't suddenly stop. he'd apprehensively slid a hand up under his shirt to discover a circular mass of slightly raised and fragile textured scar tissue, proof that it had really happened. he had really died. not dreaming. not a dreamself. he had really, honestly and undeniably died.

he didn't have time to try and comprehend that fact. he didn't know how long he'd been dead, and it would take time to get back to gamzee's house with as little knowledge of the layout of the city as he had. he does eventually make it back, however, after what we'll assume was a comical travel montage in which many hijinks were achieved.

only, standing in front of it, he isn't sure how to go about entering. what if he forgets a booby trap... what is gamzee isn't even there? no, he doesn't want to imagine what his moirail might be getting up to without him. he opts to ... try something at the very least. ]

Gamzee!

Comments

[caprihorn]

Meant you weren't at fault neither.

[And now quick as can be he circles his arms around like a tight lock on a bike and tries to hold him tight.]

_{Didn't kill yourself.}

[crab]

I brought it on myself, though. [ said tiredly into gamzee's shoulder. he's not pushing him away or hugging back he's just kind of... there. ] This is all my fault.

[caprihorn]

[Slightly angry:] Motherfuck, no. _{Eridan's at fault for what he did at you.}

You ain't him.

[crab]

Eridan is the worst piece of half chewed garbage terrible ever picked out its unbrushed, refuse encrusted fangs, and no, thank fucking god, I am not him. I don't know why you seem to think this isn't a point I have been and will continue to be one hundred percent aware of. I gave him the chance to kill me, though, when I could have avoided doing so and averted this entire fiasco. Why do I have to spell this out for you? You are the very person who has been telling me this for the past two goddamn months.

[caprihorn]

_{'Cause you didn't make the choice to get killed.} He got his choice on to murder you.

_{And you all keep making it sound} backwards like a clock that don't decide to hit one after twelve _{just goes round past eleven again.} Shit ain't right.

[crab]

I should have expected him to! I knew what he was capable of, I'd fucking seen it myself, Gamzee. I might as well have served myself up to him on a silver nutrition plateau with a target on my torso and "please murder me" painted across my face. I let you and everyone else down by not doing the intelligent thing and leaving him alone.

[caprihorn]

_{Still ain't your fault.} Should have protected yourself better than I up and did.

[crab]

I wouldn't let you protect me, if you can remember every other exchange we've had since I got here. [ he slings an arm around gamzee now, butting his shoulder gently with his horns.

there's a long, considering pause, before he says, very quietly: ]

I didn't actually think he'd kill me.

My icons for this suck

[caprihorn]

[Gamzee lets him, kind of tries to curl his shoulder a bit to accommodate those suckers. Honks gently to Karkat.]

_{Wouldn't have if he had anything in his pan or his pump biscuit.}